Monday, September 18, 2017

Monday Motivation

I have been sitting pretty in this postpartum nest...nice and cozy with very low expectations.  I have been doing kettlebells and walking/running a bit but with no goal other than to lose this dang baby weight.  This weekend...with a visit from my BRF Jill...I am putting my money where my mouth is and I'm registering for my first race post baby #3!  My favorite...Newport 10 Miler! It is my goal race and while it is not until June I know that I need to start pushing more.  Time to kick this bird out of the nest!  I am so nervous that I am just going to be awful...like I'll never be able to run double digits again...but then again what if I am better than before!  So that is my goal....better my best!!!  Taking risks is scary...but what if we fly?!!!

Tuesday, September 12, 2017

Back to School...Training...and Me

This week marks the first full week back to school for the chickies and I.  On this part of the Cape with all the tourism and such, we start school after Labor Day.  I like it because it's a good way to transition from summer to fall...and back to reality!

I love me my Summer hard, but the Fall and back-to-school time provides a good transition for me to start focusing in on some goals for myself.  It's like New Years for teachers!!  This summer for me in regards to training and all that fun was all about healing and getting my body in a place where I can start to push it again.  I've said it before, my mind is ready WAY before my body is so I didn't want to push too much too soon.  However, mentally I was going NUTS!!!  Mama needs to sweat and feel like herself again!  My mind was saying "Let's Go!!!" but this post 3rd C-section body was saying, "Slow your roll girl!" 
Now that I am 3 months down, I have started to make some semblance of a schedule and a plan for working out and running....in all honesty the running has been the hardest to fit in.  I think that this is happening because I am so much slower than before pregnancy so it takes me a lot longer to cover distances!  Also we are starting school an hour earlier so I have a lot less time in the morning than last year.  I'm determined though to fit it in and increase my speed so that I can get to where I was...and even better!! 
Right now here is what my schedule is looking like:
Monday: morning kettlebells and afternoon run
Tuesday: Family fitness....we have been going on walks and runs(since mini chickie rides her bike and we basically need to chase her!)
Wednesday: morning kettlebells and afternoon run
Thursday: morning run (Starting to make friends again with my basement treadmill)
Friday: morning kettlebells and afternoon run
Weekends....TBD
We haven't figured out how we are going to divide and conquer Saturdays with the girls soccer and both of us going to the gym yet.
Last week was sort of a "soft opening" to the school year and it went well.  I definitely need to get myself into the shower earlier because I was flying out the door.  More than anything though was the feeling I had at the gym....I felt like myself again!!!  I was so nervous to go back to the gym.  I wasn't nervous about the exercising....I was nervous about how I looked.  I know, I know but seriously!  Bellies are cute when you're pregnant...not 3 months later!  I know it isn't going to come off instantly but I will say that I am very self conscious....and avoid the giant mirrors at the gym!  I was glad I pushed myself to go though...it felt great to sweat!!!
Not quite the schedule I had before...but I didn't have 3 kids before!!!  I know it will take some moving and tweaking in order for both my husband and I to get our workouts in...but like I said...I'm willing to keep trying until it works!! 

Monday, September 11, 2017

Monday Motivation...Coming Out of the Dark

Hello?  Anyone out there?  I feel like it has been a lifetime since the last time I posted.  I'm not sure if it is the whole back-to-school time or the fact that the little man is about 3 1/2 months old now, but I am starting to feel like I'm coming out of that new mom tunnel!  This past week I started back at the gym and I'm still trying to find time to get in some miles, but I am honestly feeling more and more like myself again!  Now to just get my outsides to match my insides!!  It doesn't matter if you are a mom or just plain busy, getting out and exercising whatever it may be is so necessary!!!  It is so easy to just continually push yourself to the side in order to meet everyone's needs...but you need to fill your own tank first!  I feel like the more I am moving and fueling right, the better mom/wife I can be!  Make that choice this week...do it for you!

Monday, August 14, 2017

Monday Motivation

I have been doing a lot of comparing lately....to other new moms...to the me from last year...to other runners...and it has stolen joy each time.  I've never been one to "bounce right back" and this pregnancy is no different.  However I know I WILL get there!  I need to make the choice every day to try my best and one day I WILL be there!  Everyone's journey looks different...and so does mine!  It will be a challenge this week but I am putting my foot down on the caparison game...will you?

Monday, July 17, 2017

Monday Motivation

Last week I was cleared to start exercising.  If I've learned anything from my last two pregnancies it's that I can't start back at the intensity that I was at before pregnancy.  Some people can but my body has made it clear that after 3 C-Sections I need to take my time and be patient...something I have a hard time with.  So I have a plan.  Before I start pile on all the miles, my plan is to keep my mileage low and work more on building muscle first....like building a house.  You need to have a strong foundation first...this is evidenced by the fact that I hurt my back yesterday in church literally just coughing!!  I am so ready....ready to feel like myself again...ready to have my clothes fit again...ready to not feel like me walking around in a fat suit!  I'm ready and I have my plan!!  What goals are you working toward this week?  Make a plan and go get them!!!

Wednesday, July 5, 2017

Our Man

It's been a little over a month now and I am just now feeling like I am coming out of the haze that a new baby brings....well I'm almost out of the haze!!  I thought I would share the little man's birth story.

For me, this was a scheduled C-section due to the fact that I had had two previous C-sections and an abdominal surgery beforehand, so unfortunately there is no rushing to the hospital in the middle of the night here!  I did however a few days before think that I was in labor (cramping, back pains, etc) but no chance!  The good thing about a scheduled delivery is that we were able to solidify people to watch the girls and bring them to the hospital, and I was able to shower...and do my hair which is always a concern for us curly haired girls!!  As a side note we did have a little craziness on the way to the hospital when I realized that I had lost my wallet (with my ID and insurance card) at the movie theater the day before!!  Thankfully they held it and I was able to check in without all of it!

My biggest stress about the whole thing was actually having the C-section.  For some reason this time I was nervous.  I had a lot of family and friends praying for me which I can honestly say helped in a major way as evidenced by my steady and low heart rate during the procedure!  My husband commented that he thought his heart rate was higher than mine!  They prepped me...he came in...and then within a short amount of time we heard our little man's first cry!  Tears streamed down my face!!!  There is something magical about that moment to me...the baby who I had been talking to for the past 10 months was now talking to me!!  They brought him over and let me hold him!!!

From there they took my husband and the baby out of the room to finish up with me.  This was honestly the only time where I was nervous and honestly super uncomfortable.  This actually took over an hour!!  Because I had extensive scar tissue my doctor had to really pull and tug all over the place!  This ending up causing more pain for me than the actual C-section!  By the time I got back to my room my upper abs (from my belly button to my chest) KILLED and really was the source of all my pain in healing!


Due to the procedure I was in the hospital 4 days while my poor husband had to juggle the family at home...school, softball, field trips, you name it!  By the time we hit 4 days I was READY to go home!


I want to be completely honest about the days that followed.  I don't do this to complain but instead to paint a realistic picture.  I feel like it can be so isolating living the "Facebook age" where everything looks perfect.  You often feel like you are the only one not holding it all together!  I had originally had the plan to breastfeed.  I had tried with my other two but was never successful long-term.  I was determined this time to make it work.  I managed fine in the hospital...when it was just little man and I.

When I got home...it was mom of 3 time and for me that was a HUGE game changer!  I had support from my loving husband and also my awesome mom who came down for a week to help us with driving the kids and giving me support...I also had my awesome father-in-law who brought the girls home each day from school so I didn't have to make the 40 min drive every day!  However the thought that I was it...the only person who could feed the baby...the thought that the following week I was going to have my 4 year-old....my very very active 4 year-old home with me...and the thought that I would never be able to leave the house again without having to have a plan became so overwhelming for me.  For two days I had panic attacks and chest pains over this and in the end I decided to stop and use formula.  I know so many rockstar moms who breastfeed and my hat goes off to them honestly but for me and my mental health I just couldn't.  He is fine...growing awesome...and I'm able to feed him and love on him and not feel so much anxiety!

Life with our little man is full....it's crazy...and there are moments when I wonder if our life will ever not be a circus again, but we love him so much and can't imagine our circus without him!

The growing pains of growing our family will one day be behind us and we will have an amazing man added to our life!


Monday, July 3, 2017

Monday Motivation

I am still waiting to get the green light to work out...but that's not keeping me from making goals!  A little fun fact is that I have worn the same dress on the first day of school for the past 7 years....the same black sleeveless dress with a ruffle down the front.  Well I tried it on yesterday and let's just say I wouldn't be caught dead in it right now...plus the zipper was not too happy with me!  So there it is...I have 2 months to keep the tradition going!  I figured I could spend the next two months wishing I fit into it, or I could do something about it.
Don't quit on a dream just because of time....you can and will get there!