Monday Motivation

This past week I was out of commission from Tuesday on...doctor said stretching ligaments but I probably had overdone it.  This certainly continued to creep into my mind...not to lose myself in having to rest...not to allow myself to panic...seek out different ways to stay active if the pain continued.  We know our weaknesses...our strengths...and how we have defeated ourselves in the past.  Don't let it creep in!  Beat that person!  I'm not going to let the mounting work I am going to need to do to get myself back to running and my old fitness level keep me from staying positive and doing what I can now!  Own the old you!!!  You can do it!

TTT

It's been a while since I have dropped some randomness on you all....you're welcome!!

Daydreaming...The past few days I have been struggling with pains in my stomach (no worries I am finally listening to my husband and I am calling my doctor).  I think they are probably going to say something along the lines of it being ligament pain which for this non-complaining mama makes me resist calling.  However, I have been ending most days lately doubled over with stomach pain and unable to workout let alone run!  This has been me lately as I go through my friends' Instagram pictures of their training runs...

Yeah through my other two pregnancies I never had this kind of pain and was able to run and workout up until just a few days before the ladies came.  Anyone else have a drastically different pregnancy the third time around???

Ryan Hall...Ryan Hall is currently in the throws of attempting the 7 marathons in 7 days on 7 continents challenge. 

He felt that he didn't have a proper farewell to running and is using this as his farewell tour.  Now if you haven't seen him lately he looks vastly different from the tall, lanky marathoner that used to glide along the courses of the world's top marathons.  He has put on about 40lbs of muscle and now looks more like this...

However if you have read anything about this challenge it is crazy brutal...and he's owning it!  It's quite the bid farewell to racing!!

Cravings...Since I am not having any cravings...and never really have for any of my pregnancies...I'm polling the audience.  What are some cravings that you have had while pregnant?  Right now I don't crave anything but when people talk about food it all sounds amazing!  So...give me some cravings!!!

Refections on Loss

I write this post more to walk through my feelings...give a glimpse into my life beyond the sweat and family.  I have not posted anything about this on social media more because I didn't know how I felt really and I, as always, want to stay respectful.  No I am not posting about the election...you will never see me post here on that, sorry.  I'm reflecting today on loss...

Today we bury my grandfather.  My father's father passed away last week at the age of 95.

Without being disrespectful to my family, I can safely describe my relationship with my grandfather as acquaintance.  We saw him as children when we went to my grandparents house to visit or at Christmas and family functions, but aside from that we didn't really know each other.  We lived in the next town over, and considering we lived on an island that was about 37 miles long total for 3 towns, we didn't see him much.  One of the things that I have noticed about myself is that if I see someone or a situation as one that is going to cause conflict, I stay far away from it.  This could explain why as an adult I have had even less contact with my grandfather.  For a large part of my life I sat back and watched...watched how he interacted with my cousins and even more with my sister.  I heard his words to my sister and, whether consciously or not, I stayed clear.  I said what he wanted to hear and did very little to draw attention to myself.  As an adult, the time that I have seen my grandfather could possibly be counted on one hand.  He has only met our children once or twice and would probably never would have known who they were void of myself.  I don't say any of this to disrespect my grandfather in any way....just being honest.  He was an old-school, hard-working Portuguese man...he raised his sons probably in a very similar way that he himself was raised...and didn't think to break that cycle.

When I heard the news that my grandfather had passed away, it caught me by surprised that my first emotion was sadness.  I had reflected before about how I would feel and never thought it would catch me the way it did.  I think a large part of that was sadness for my own father.  I was sad for him to have lost his father.  The more I thought about it though I think part of me was sad for the relationship we never had...and now never will.  I look at my children and how much they know and love their grandparents...how much their grandparents have invested purposefully in their lives...how going to their houses is like an extension of their own home...how they look forward to seeing them...and just how deep that love goes on both sides.  I also think about my children's great-grandparents...about our youngest asking just about every day to go to Mimi's house...about how our world and their world will be rocked that day she goes to meet Jesus...about how loved I felt by my husband's grandfather and how heartbroken I felt after he passed.  I think about all that love...all that support...all those prayers raised for our children each day...about the relationships there that exists.  And it makes me sad...for me but also for him. 

On this day I may find myself caught again feeling sad...mourning.  But I am comforted to know that our girls bring light to their grandparents faces...that they are blessed by their love!  I am thankful for grandparents who choose to pour their love over their grandchildren. 

Monday Motivation

You had to know that today's motivation HAD to include the Patriots!  I mean really!!!  Superbowl bound!! Lately my belief in my abilities...both pregnant and the ability to bounce back once our little man is here have been minimal at best.  The lack of running is playing with my head along with watching my body expand...but TB12 is right...if I can't believe in myself then who will??  Believe that you can reach your goal no matter how lofty it may seem!!!  Believe and you will get there!!!

May I Have a Word?

Each year for the past few years I have decided on a word or phrase to use to either motivate myself when I am dragging or to help me focus.  This year it is this...

I'm entering 2017 knowing it is going to be a year of a lot of transitions which if we are being honest is not my strong suit.  I'm good at making a plan...carrying the plan out...sticking to the plan.  My weakness comes when I make a plan and 10 deviations later we still have not carried out A plan let alone THE plan.  Being pregnant...having child #3...and establishing a new normal is not really conducive to plan making!

My desire with choosing this as my phrase for the year, is that during this year of change beyond my control, that I would find joy in each situation.  Some things I need to remind myself....

• This is the last pregnancy....I want to remind myself to savor each kick...each milestone...each moment I can touch my stomach and know that our little man is growing in there.  I want to find joy in this instead of focusing on my ever expanding waistline and rear!  
• My body WILL bounce back...I have done it twice before and I can do it again.  Will it be a lot of work...yes but I am ready for the challenge and I WILL get there.  I need to remind myself to find joy in the process of my body creating life and then returning back to itself (or perhaps even better) again.
• Savor each milestone...This week is week 20 for me and instead of wishing the next 20 away I know I need to savor the moments...the moments when my baby girl is still the baby of the family...the moments when we welcome our little boy into our family...the middle-of-the-night moments when he is staring up at me...the times we have as a family of 4 and then of 5!  Each milestone holds a special place and I need to remember the joy in them!

This year instead of looking at the mud I am choosing to focus on the stars!  I'm choosing to and will continue to remind myself to FIND JOY!

Monday Motivation

Wow that was quite the break from this here blog!  I honestly wish I had more to show for it...like clean closets or an organized basement, but I do have a lot of memories and time spent with my family!  Speaking of which that brings me to today's motivation.  Now I've used this quote for after a long run gone wrong...or a bad day at work...but today it applies to being a parent!  This past weekend here on Cape Cod was not only cold and windy but we got hit with about 20" of snow in 24 hours which left us all a little stir crazy.  Honestly speaking at one point my husband wished we had a dog so we could send it out back with our mini-chickie to try and tire her out!  If Sunday night was a finish line, we limped across the finish!  However today is a new day!  We still love our little chickies and life is good...just a little less time trapped indoors would be key!