Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Words for Wednesday...Doing What Your Momma Taught You

"If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all!"

I have been writing this post in my mind for the past week or so trying to find just the right words so that I don't sound like I'm whining or being bitter in any way.  My thoughts started to form after reading a post by one of the sweetest ladies I read (I don't know her in real life).  She is in her second pregnancy and is bigger than she was with her first (even though she is a peanut still!) and she was reflecting on how people's comments have made her feel this time around.  For some reason or another, people's internal filter gets turned off the moment they see a baby bump.  Comments they would never make to an overweight person just flow freely from their mouth like....
"Wow you're really big"
"Were you this big with your last?"
"You sure you want that salt given how much you could swell even more?"
"Are you sure there is just one?"
"My______ is pregnant too but she's much smaller than you!"
"How much weight have you gained so far?"
I'm sure there are a flurry of comments people have made to women that are really tiny their whole pregnancy as well....just never had that problem! I mean it's not like I can suck it shouldn't be open season on the comments.  You have to read this article I posted on Facebook with 20 things never to say to a pregnant lady....hilarious!

I had never given much thought during my first pregnancy about these comments except the passing, "Ummm ok thanks?"  I loved my belly and stuck it out proud.  Then I had to lose the weight.....yeah not so easy!  During this pregnancy I was confused at first as to why it was such a goal for me NOT to look pregnant even now that I am almost 20 weeks.  I feel HUGE even though when I put on my old maternity clothes I am swimming in them.  I think part of it has to do with being given those messages in my previous pregnancy....I was huge (even though my very kind family tells me I wasn't) and I suppose I was trying to avoid those same things.  Who knows.  

I know today my baby and I are both healthy....I'm running still (and hopefully pain free thanks to the advice of several of my Fitfluential running mommas)....and while my belly is growing (exponentially it seems by the day) I am working it (most of the time!).  This is a short time in my life and I am going to try my best to celebrate each moment...each expansion of the waistline...each kick...each milestone!  And while I'm at it I'm going to tell a fellow pregnant lady that she looks fabulous!!!  


  1. Your family thinks you look beautiful.

    1. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL-and anyone who asks those questions has a broken filter!! Love you!

  2. I was on the other side of things... I was really tiny with my pregnancy and all of the comments made me feel like I was doing something harmful to my baby or that she was not healthy. I agree with you, enjoy each moment of being pregnant. It's not something that happens easy for everyone and it should be considered a blessing to have an ever expanding waistline! Congrats on making it to 20 weeks and I pray the second half goes smoothly for you!!! My girl is 6 months now and I still can't believe I am her Momma.

  3. Yep, people are idiots. Enjoy this time and know that you are doing the best you can for both you and your little. Plus, I bet you look fabulous :)

  4. People can be so rude! Luckily I don't remember people ever saying anything like that to me even though I gained 50 lbs with both my pregnancies and I know I looked huge:) Enjoy your pregnancy and be proud of your bump!

  5. I love the things people say when you are pregnant,
    like "are you sure you aren't having twins?"


    Being healthy is the most important thing really!

  6. Sometimes people have no filter..very rude. Enjoy your pregnancy and don't worry about what everyone else says!

  7. People without a filter and those that think they have a right to touch your stomach when you're pregnant drive me crazy and I've never even been pregnant!

  8. Why DO people think they can say ANYTHING they like to a pregnant woman? It is ridiculous and sometimes so hurtful...

    I love that your MOM was your first commenter on this post and I am glad to hear that you and your babe are healthy.

    Cute cartoon!

  9. It is hard to not be hurt by those comments when you are pregnant. I was huge with darling daughter and I had so many people telling me it...almost daily. It wasn't really until after the fact that I realized how much those comments really hurt me. And I agree, the next time I see someone pregnant I do want to tell her how beautiful she is!