Pay It Forward

First let me say thank you to all of you for your encouraging words. I know it is a daily choice and it will take time but it is so nice to feel the love!!!

Today I was trying to think of something significant to do for 1-11-11...run 11 miles? (no time today)...no clue so I decided to share two of my favorite stories this morning that have touched me this week.

The first is from a blog that I stalk...I mean read daily. She is a Mom of 2 little girls and an amazing photographer. I mean I wish I could have half her talent! Well her youngest daughter was born unexpectedly with Down Syndrome. The way that she has worked this into a positive in her life is inspiring! Her beautiful daughter is turning 1 soon and she is raising money for Down Syndrome. Stop by her blog here and click on the icon on the top. She is encouraging others to pay it forward and celebrate life!

The second story was from an article I read in my Runner's World last week. It was titled "Moving Comfort" and if you don't get the magazine click here. The article told the story of a mom whose husband died in Afghanistan while serving in the Army. Her two children are small and at the time her youngest was only 3-weeks old. This story was so humbling. She shared how she uses running to reflect and connect again with her husband. She went on to show how she and many other Army wives gather each week and run to remember and/or honor those who fight for our freedom. The story was just so moving and humbling to see these women's strength.

I hope you have a great 1-11-11!!!

Grace

I've started and stopped this post many times because I was nervous to even put it out there but then I thought that if it could help just one person who is struggling with the same thing then there is a purpose. Additionally it will help me.

All of my life I have wanted to be ahead of the curve...always striving to do it first and be the best. I taught myself how to write in cursive well before my peers because I wanted to. This ambition has led me to where I am today but wanting to be the best has also been a major hindrance to me as a person. It is not only that I want to be the best at things it is that I think less of myself and beat myself up about not being perfect. And the thought of someone actually knowing that I am not perfect scares the daylights out of me. Now I'm sure you are saying, "Come on no one is perfect" but for me it was always to give the appearance that I always had it together.

Throughout my life I have wanted to keep that "together" appearance and it still drives me now. The problem is that the worse life gets, the harder I would work at the appearance of super woman. Through all life's trials, even devastating ones, I strove to look like nothing was wrong. The result has been very isolating because I never asked for help or gave the impression that I needed it. I have pushed friends away because if they got close enough they would see what a disaster I was! One time in college I went to a counselor for anxiety and by the end of the session she was asking me why I even came because it didn't appear that anything was wrong.

I am not perfect....I forget to do things....I eat things I'm not supposed to....I let my daughter watch Elmo when I'm feeling tired....She isn't bilingual even though I am....I forget birthdays and to send cards when I should....I leave the laundry in the dryer for days...I snap at my hubby when he doesn't deserve it...I spend many days of my life thinking I am a colossal failure...I am not perfect.

This year one of my resolutions is to learn to love me....This is my first step to doing that. I am going to strive to give myself the grace that has been given to me....I am going to realize that the Lord doesn't not send me through trials so that I can hide them from the world. I need to reach out and ask for support. More importantly I need to give myself the grace to not be perfect....because WHO IS???

So looking at my resolutions if I don't make 1000 miles, or on Dec. 31st the scale isn't where I want it to be I will not have failed. However if I haven't taught myself to embrace imperfection I will have failed myself and my family. Thanks for reading and I apologize for the randomness but I just really felt called to sharing this and my struggle. I pray that 2011 will be the year of grace!

Three Things Thursday

So looking at my goals for 2011 I know that the most challenging for me will be to lose at least 13lbs. I have started the book "Racing Weight" since I have heard so much about it on bloggy land and am beginning to form a plan. Since I fell face first into the sweets and anything bad during the holidays, I have since cut out sugar (like candy, etc. not fruit) and white flour, and have increased my water intake. My Three Things today are things that I need to make sure that I do in order to stay on track...

1. Stay OUT of the teacher's room!!! This is a dumping ground for all the treats and snacks that no one wants in there house anymore. Like I had extra cupcakes from Em's party and I brought them in knowing someone would eat them.

2. Be prepared!!! Right around 2:30pm I am tired and starving...I need to make sure I pack healthy snacks so that I can have something and not turn to crap or worse wait until I get home and eat my face off!!! This will take planning...any suggestions for good snacks?

3. Food log and weigh-ins! I am horrible at keeping any kind of log...diary, running log, food log you name it! I know it will keep me on track and show me what I am eating. Also our school is extending their Biggest Loser Contest to the Spring so I am going to be weighing in weekly which will keep me focused since I have to pay for each lb I gain.

I can't wait to see how fast I can be with the right nutrition and weight!!!

Feeling Convicted

Every year I find myself grumbling about the new people at the gym and how I can't go as fast as I want. Well last night and this morning I am feeling very convicted. I should be applauding and welcoming these people. They are making a choice to get healthy and instead of getting grouchy I need to say hi and make them feel like they belong. I don't know what my problem is. I get so excited when someone I love chooses to start running or go to the gym. Why should I treat strangers any differently? So to all those who I got snippy with last night, I'm sorry. Kudos to you for making a decision to get healthy this year!!!


I put up a few races for the year so far. This is like a second job!!! I am trying to find ones that are fairly close to where I live and don't have a hefty price tag attached. For example, In Feb there is a 10 in Hyannis the next town over but it is $45. No thanks! Some fun ones that I found are in April. One runs over a bridge near where I grew up. The other is a 5k at my old nursery school. I thought it would be so fun to run with Em at my alma matter! I'll add more soon. If anyone knows of some good races in New England...send them my way!!!

Resolutions I Should Have Made....

...not wait until the last second to leave the house for work.....
...not to eat dinner before going to the gym...
...not to whine, make fun of, get irritated with all the new people at the gym now that it is January

Today's gym visit was weight time...I thought I would share with the class what my workout looks like. This came from my very favorite trainer in the whole world, Di. She is a lovable trainer who could give Jillian a run for her money. I would be a flabby mess if it wasn't for her and I miss her like crazy. I digress....

So here was today's workout. I hope it helps you! The supersets are exercises done one after another 3 times. For example: 12 lunges, 12 shoulder raises, 12 bicep curls then repeat 3 times.

10 min run @ 8 min mile pace
Superset #1
walking lunges (out and back), lateral raises, hammer curls
Superset #2
chest press, reverse fly, tricep kickbacks one armed
abs
10 min elliptical
Superset#3
one-legged squat, front raises, bicep curls
Superset#4
flies, tricep extensions, upright row
abs
10 min bike
stretch

Normally I would go and do another 2 supersets and 10 more minutes but it was getting close to 9pm and I wanted to go home. The basic premise is to keep your heart rate elevated the whole time. Ok now I'm friggin wiped and going to bed!!!

Resolution Monday

Ok so I mentally began my resolutions on Jan. 1st but I have to admit that many of them were put off until today. I mean why waste a perfectly good weekend?! So here are my resolutions...cause I know you're dying to know!!!

Personal....Quick and easy...
Laugh MORE, worry LESS....2010 was my year of being a stress case. I mean I was having panic attacks complete with chest pains and shortness of breathe, twitching eyes, headaches, and an overall stressed disposition. I am making a conscientious effort this year to worry less and know that God is in control.

Love ME....I have spent way too many years of my life not liking what I saw in the mirror. When it comes to critics I am my worst one. I give grace out like it is going out of style until it comes to me. This year I want to begin the journey of loving me not only for myself but so that I can give this example to my daughter. I want her to be a strong confident woman some day and the best way to help her do that is to be an example of one! I always go back to something I read once that talked about when we look at ourselves and say awful things it is like telling God that He did an awful job.

Physical....

Get to racing weight....Especially after this week of fun I am putting it out there that I would like to lose 13lbs. Now really I just need to eat healthier and have less junk around. I have lost 60lbs since having Emma and I would like to just lose those last few which I know will be a challenge. I know my running will be better plus I know I will be healthier!

Stretch more....This is the first thing to go when I'm pressed for time. If I want to be a runner for the long haul I need to stretch more.

Weights...Yeah nuf said! I need to stick to 3 days of weights. I love the feeling of being strong and this will get me there!

Running....
There is so much I want to do in this category but starters would be to hit my 1000 mile mark again....and maybe extend it to 1500!!!!

Injury-free....yeah this would be another blessing

12 races for the bling...I have a ticker of races that I would like to do this year and over the next few days I'll put them on here. This month I'm going to focus on training for a 10 miler and 20 miler...oh boy! Who knows what the future holds!

PR baby....I would love to beat my PRs this year!!! Yet another reason to chip away at the extra lbs....less to carry around=faster momma!

Have fun....Overall this year I want to just have a blast running! I have a great running partner and we have a lot of laughs!

So there you have it in a nutshell! I pray that 2011 brings me many happy, healthy miles as well as a shrinking waistline! Either way it will be a journey and I hope you will join!

Virtual 5 Miler

Yesterday I headed to the canal to meet Jill, her boyfriend Brian, and her brother Stu for a virtual 5 miler with Run to the Finish. Other than the scenery being gorgeous since the path runs along the canal, the weather was amazing at 45 degrees. That is a minor miracle on Jan 1st in New England!

The race bibs were such an awesome idea and instead of a number you put your resolution. I have many this year (which is another post all together) but my most important one and the one on my bib was to laugh more and worry less. This past year I realized how much time and energy I spent being stressed. In 2011 I want to work on laughing more...at life...at myself...at adversity...just laugh!

We had a great time together enjoying a great day and a great run!! What a way to kick off 2011!!! Now to tackle the other resolution on my bib...to lose those Christmas pounds!